Dealing With The Stress Of Being A Parent

Becoming a parent is a life changing event, and while bringing up children certainly can be a joyful experience there's no denying that it can also place huge stresses on you as a mother or father. Commonly recommended ways of dealing with stress in other areas of life tend to involve 'getting away from it all', such as visits to the gym or a game of squash to release the tension. However, being a parent is a full time job and it's not always possible to take time out in this way.

Luckily, there are several ways of dealing with your stress that actively involve your children, and so are much easier to apply to your day to day life. You'll also probably find that enjoying time with your children while simultaneously lowering your stress levels will deepen your mutual bonds and strengthen your relationship - which sounds like a good thing all round!

Once your child is old enough to walk, you'll likely find yourself constantly watching out for them as they use their seemingly unlimited energy to explore both their environment and their own physical skills and potentials. This can sometimes be draining of the parents' energy and a factor of stress, but why not use the situation to your advantage? Harness their energy and curiosity by taking them to a safe place such as a park or the open country, and join in with their games in the sunshine and fresh air. Exercise is a proven stress-buster, and outdoor fun with your kids is probably more enjoyable than a gym workout, and almost certainly less expensive!

Artistic expression is good for your child's development, and also good for the parent's soul. Join in with your child's painting sessions, let yourself go, and get as covered in paint as she does. You might not create a masterpiece, but you'll have fun together and this small reversion to your own childhood can provide relief from your stressed adult world.

In a similar vein, music can be another great aid in the battle against stress. Maybe the most obvious way of using music is to choose something mellow and relaxing, but this is unlikely to appeal to your child as much as it does to you, and so is perhaps best left until after they're in bed and you can listen in peace. A better choice is a piece of music that has energy and encourages dancing. Your child will need no encouragement to get down and boogie, but maybe you will - try it, let yourself go a little, jump around a bit, and you can both laugh with each other and at yourselves.

If you're still feeling stressed, then head for your child's toybox and choose the noisiest toy you can find. Something like a drum is ideal. Let out your pent up frustrations by making a total racket - your child may be bemused at first but should soon enter into the spirit of things. One thing to bear in mind though, is that this last activity is perhaps best conducted in the safety of your own home, and away from the eyes of non-parent adults who may not quite understand!

The Most Common Parenting Mistake Of All

Becoming a parent, especially for the first time, is an exciting but scary experience. You'll be entering a whole new world where different rules apply, and no matter how prepared you think you are, there's usually little you've experienced before which you can draw on when making the choices and snap decisions that will become a major part of your life once the little one arrives.

It's for this reason that there's an abundance of parenting advice available which you can use to inform your decisions. There are print magazines packed with useful advice, web sites with tons of articles to peruse, not to mention the well meaning but sometimes irritating advice and opinions of family and friends. Despite all this information being available, most parents are terrified that they're somehow not up to the job and will do it wrong, and herein lies the most common parenting mistake of all: not trusting in your own judgment and instincts.

However intimidating the prospect is of having ultimate responsibility for the nurture of a new and precious life, you should be in no doubt that you have exactly the skills and capabilities you'll need over the coming years.

Think about it. As human beings, we're all parenting specialists. In evolutionary and genetic terms, our whole existence is geared towards producing and nurturing offspring, and over the millions of years that the human species has been developing we've become generally incredibly good at it. You only need to watch a mother and child together to know that however difficult the process may seem, bringing up a child is the most natural thing in the world, and something for which each and every parent to be has the necessary skills to make a success of it if they make it their number one focus.

Of course, this doesn't mean that you should ignore all advice. After all, the experience handed down from generation to generation is absolutely vital and is how civilization developed in the first place. Not one of us has all the answers, we all need input from others in all kinds of situations.

But trust in your own capabilities as a parent above all else, and trust in your own ability to make the best of all the advice and support that's out there. That way you'll definitely be the best parent your child could ever have.